Heartache

This morning, I’d had just about enough of Dora the Explorer and Go, Diego, Go!, so I decided to thumb through the massive book of DVD’s hiding in our TV armoire to find something kid appropriate. Rifling through the pages, I happened across the video I made for the girls’ first birthday. We used to watch that thing over and over for months after their birthday, but hadn’t seen it in at least a year. So, I popped it in the DVD player for the three of us to enjoy and reflect on.

It all started well; the girls jumped and danced to “Little Bitty Pretty One” when the music started on the menu screen. The video began to play and I returned my attention to my half-eaten lunch. Then, out of nowhere, Cadie was moping across the room, fresh tears pooled in her eyes and her bottom lip quivering. I could tell she wasn’t upset about a toy, her sister pushing her, or something else of that nature. She was genuinely distraught. I pulled her up into my lap and asker her what was wrong. Immediately, the tears began to flow. The video was clearly upsetting her. My first instinct was to cut the TV off, but I decided against it. The pictures that flashed across the screen were her past, something she should be proud of. What she went through in those first months of life helped shape her into who she is today, a wonderful little girl with a beautiful heart and tender spirit. Then, I was confused. How many times had we watched this very same video with a very different reaction? Usually, the girls squeal with delight each time their faces appear on the screen. They’re even able to pick out who is who. I didn’t understand, but it was important to me that we continued to watch and talk about what they were seeing. We shared a good cry, then I began offering commentary every time a new picture appeared. “Oh, look at that picture of Cadie! Isn’t she so pretty?” “Yes, Maddie, you have a tube in your mouth. That tube helped you breathe because you were very sick and couldn’t do it by yourself.” “See? You’re getting bigger Cadie. That’s right before you ate from a bottle for the first time.” Eventually, the tears slowed, only picking up here and there, until her mild hysteria ceased, then slowly transformed to a smile. As we watched our way through those first few difficult weeks, it was like watching her healing and growing all over again right before my eyes. I knew all was well again when I felt her began to dance on my lap with the introduction of an upbeat song. The worst was over.

I really can’t say what prompted today’s heartache. I hope and pray that video didn’t stir up any bad memories; I hope they don’t remember anything from that time in their lives. It’s possible that Cadie’s very tender heart was just upset by how visibly sick and fragile they both were after they were born. I don’t want her to be afraid of those images, though. I want her to be proud.

Cadence - 4/4/06

Cracktastic

I don’t mean to be crude, but I really can’t think of a polite way to say it. My daughters have a problem with crack – of the butt persuasion, that is. Bless their hearts, they can’t keep up a pair of pants to save their lives. The problem is their little waists require a smaller size, while their heights demand something closer to their actual age. It’s a lose-lose situation. They either wear high waters or low riders. Since it’s cold outside, I went with the low riders… they can always wear a long shirt! In this respect, they are their Poppy’s grand-daughters.

A Tale of Snot

Last night, we were making our way through our typical bedtime routine, when Cadie insisted that she give Maddie night-night sugars and hugs. It’s something new they’re both insisting on and why would we squash and opportunity for sisterly love? In truth, it’s probably just another opportunity to get out of bed and delay the inevitable bedtime, but I’ll take that over, “Mommy, I need to go potty!” any day.

So, Cadie leaned in and gave Maddie her best “monster” hug, then moved in for the kiss. I can only guess that, due to the dim lighting conditions, Cadie failed to notice Maddie’s upper lip condition because she quickly pulled away with an audible “Ew!” and said, “She got snot on me!” Oh, the sweet sounds of bedtime.

High Five

Last Friday morning, Cadie woke up with a strong conviction that she wear big girl panties. I’m not want to fuss in the am (I’m not much of a morning person), so I obliged. I was impressed when naptime approached without a single accident. Not only had she made it half the day without messing herself, every single time she went to the potty, it was solo event. She did it all; walk back to the bathroom, pull down her pants and panties, get up on the potty, get her own tissue and wipe, get back off the potty, pull her panties and pants up, flush the potty, and leave the bathroom. I thought to myself, “This can’t possibly last!”

So, imagine my surprise, when she woke from her nap with completely dry Pull-ups (I believe in my daughter, but I’m also realistic, so Pull-ups were very much a part of the naptime equation). Her big girl panties went right back on, and the day continued accident free. Fast forward three days and nothing has changed. That’s right, folks, Cadie has not had a single accident in four days! I won’t even pretend to take any credit for her spontaneous potty training. Sure, we’ve taught her how the potty works, that it’s better to go in it rather than her panties, etc., but she did all the hard work. I can’t imagine why I’m surprised. Why would this particular developmental milestone be any different than the others? Cadie has always decided when she’s ready to do something, then done it. Simple as that.

Now, every time Cadie uses the potty, we honor it with her celebratory recognition of choice, a high five. After she washes her hands, of course.

The Christmas Train

I saw billboard advertisements for the Christmas Train in November, and my curiosity was immediately piqued. The girls are into anything train related, and since we weren’t able to ride the train in Eureka Springs, I thought maybe this Christmas Train would make up for it. So, I asked the family if they wanted to go, and we told the girls the good news. Little did I know, there are a limited number of tickets and a limited number of dates. So, when the tickets are gone, they’re gone. Needless to say, I checked on a Friday and found four open days; I went back the next evening to purchase our tickets and they were completely sold out. Sold out in less than a day! I was shocked, then devastated. I’m embarrassed to say that I actually cried. I was so upset for the girls, and I felt guilty for promising and getting them excited about a train ride that I wouldn’t be able to give them.

After I got over my disappointment a little, I started checking Craigslist for extra tickets. There were a couple of brief glimmers of hope, but they all fizzled out with, “Sorry, I already sold them.” Finally, though, my sister forwarded an email to me from someone selling tickets. By the time I got in touch with her, she’d already sold them, but she told me her sister was possibly interested in selling hers. Long story short, I had an email the next morning saying she had four tickets for us to go to the Christmas Train. Hallelujah!

I decided not to tell the girls the good news until I had those tickets in my hand, but Cadie squealed with joy when we pulled up to Dry Gulch and came face to face with a massive train. She immediately asked if we were going to ride it, and so help me, I couldn’t tell her “no”. Luckily, the woman who was selling her tickets came through, and we found ourselves in 19 degree weather in the middle of Dry Gulch USA. We thought it best to go straight to the train, even though there were other things to do. We didn’t have to wait in line too long, and we were relieved to see that they had more than one train running. The girls were beside themselves, grinning through their chattering teeth. There was plenty of room on the train –which was, thankfully, enclosed—and the windows were plenty big for the girls to see. So, we sat back and enjoyed as the Christmas Train wheeled us through the forest full of pictures depicting the story of Jesus. They had live scenes mixed in here and there, and the girls were excited when they saw baby Jesus. I was surprised by how emotionally touching the whole thing was. It was moving watching the story through the girls’ eyes, their innocence.

After the train ride, Cadie unsurprisingly asked if we could ride again. I had to explain to her that we were only allowed to go once. We opted to search out some grub, but made the unfortunate mistake of passing the playground on the way. Under other conditions, I would have been happy to allow the girls to play for an hour. This particular evening, though, was the coldest we’d had all winter and the girls’ red noses and frosty breath were proof enough. We allowed them a couple of trips down the slide, then pried them from the playground and headed to dinner.

After our bellies were full of tasty –and surprisingly, not ridiculously expensive—barbecue, we ended the evening with a ride around the carousel. The girls are suckers for carousels, and we’re suckers for the girls, so a ride –despite the freezing temperature—was inevitable. Amid the sounds of chattering teeth, we heard squeals of joy and delight, so it was worth it. The perfect ending to a perfectly frosty evening!

Patton Family Christmas

Since we spend the majority of the Thanksgiving holiday with Jeff’s family, we in turn, spend the majority of the Christmas holiday with my family. So, for the past couple of years, we’ve gotten together with Jeff’s family a couple of weeks before Christmas to celebrate. We all gather at Jeff’s parents’ house, play games, eat a tasty dinner, open gifts, and stay the night. This year, we celebrated with Jeff’s mom and dad and his brother, Julius, and his wife, Kimberly.

We started off with a delicious steak dinner, stuffing ourselves nearly as badly as we had on Thanksgiving. Then, we moved on to presents because who can wait too long when there are two two-year-old’s lurking around? The girls got a bunch of fun stuff including Doodlebops microphones, a cash register, and an Aquadoodle mat. Finally, after some fierce Mario Kart on the Wii –that was a sight I never thought I would see, Jeff’s parents playing Mario Kart! – we all settled in to bed.

The next morning, we continued the festivities by making a gingerbread train. The girls love gingerbread and trains, so it was a good option all around. In the end, a lot more candy and icing ended up in mouths (including Daddy’s) than on the train, but it was a lot of fun.

All in all, it was another fun Patton Family Christmas!

Bright Lights, Big City

Every year, Rhema Bible College puts on a spectacular display of Christmas lights. Actually, ‘display’ is such an inadequate word to describe what they do, but it’s the best I can come up with. Some years it’s far too cold to get out an enjoy, so we just drive through in the car. This year, though, we got lucky with some wonderful weather early on in December, so we took advantage of it. The girls really enjoyed the event last year, so I knew they would love it even more this time around. They ‘ooh-d’ and ‘ahh-d’ as we journeyed through the jaw dropping, sparkle of lights that is Rhema at Christmas time. This year’s production was more impressive than any could remember in the past. They had a new set-up towards the front of lights that coordinated with music arrangements. It was amazing. As expected, the girls had a wonderful time, and you can bet we’ll be attending again next year.

Old Lady Glasses

December 1st, we took the girls in for their semi-annual appointment with Dr. Groves. Maddie still has to be checked to make sure her right retina is still firmly intact and showing no signs of going anywhere, while Cadie’s vision has to be checked for changes in her prescription. One of the nice things about the girls having had doctors’ appointments regularly since they were born? They don’t get scared anymore. It’s just another day to them. Both girls did really well with their exam, and we were happy to hear that Maddie’s eyes still look completely healthy and that Cadie’s vision was much the same. No prescription changes for her. Maddie had to have her eyes dilated for the exam, so she was offered some special glasses to protect her eyes from the sun as we left. Of course, knowing trouble would be brewing in the very near future, I asked if Cadie could have a set as well. They wore them the whole way home and just long enough for me to get a quick picture. They reminded me so much of the huge, dark glasses that people wear as they get older. Cracked me up!

Farkletastic

Every year, the day after Thanksgiving, we celebrate the Family Farkle Festival. This year marked the festival’s sixth anniversary. We gathered, once again, at Jack and Janet’s house for the celebration. Those in attendance were: Roger & Babs Cheatham; Sarah Cheatham; Josh Cheatham; Jeffrey, Emily, and Rebekah Harris; Julius & Kimberly Patton; Jack & Janet Patton; Jeff, Cheri, Cadie, and Maddie Patton; and Kelly & Laura Greenleaf. We had just as much fun as ever, laughing and heckling while we played. The big winners were:

Babs Cheatham – Lowest Individual Game & Worst Farkler
Roger Cheatham – Highest Individual Game & 3rd Place
Emily Harris – 2nd Place
Kimberly Patton – Most Flat Out Farkles
Laura Greenleaf – 1st Place
Jeffrey Harris – Lucile Cheatham Congeniality Award

I know, I know…we’re a weird bunch. But, we have so much fun, and it’s always such a good time, a way to let loose and just enjoy being together as a family. If it makes you feel any better, we only get to do this once a year. Never heard of Farkle? Let your imagination run wild, then Google it.

Turkey Day

Thanksgiving is always a big holiday with Jeff’s family, and this year was no exception. Jeff’s cousin, Emily, has a little girl a little over a year younger than the girls, so I knew they would have a fun time playing together. This year, since the girls require less wrangling, I got to be more of a participant in the kitchen. I love cooking, and Thanksgiving is always one of those opportunities to show what you’re made of. I took orders and dove in with the best of them. The meal was fantastic, and looking around the table after everyone had stuffed themselves, it was quite filling as well. The rest of the day was spent enjoying the unseasonably warm weather, the girls playing on the front porch swing and running up and the down the sidewalk “runway”.

We continued with our yearly tradition of sitting in a circle and, in turn, sharing how our year has been and what we’re most thankful for. It’s amazingly easy to get caught up in the triviality of every day life, but this exercise has always helped us to look past that and remember (and share with family) what really matters and how truly blessed we are. We were blessed with the best year of business Jeff has ever had. His new business partner has been such a boost to his work in the financial, emotional, and spiritual senses of the word. The girls were blessed with excellent health, always better than they should have given their premature births. They’ve grown into amazing and inspiring little girls, starting new adventures like school and making us smile with the phrases that come out of their little mouths. I have been blessed with a business that has far exceeded any and all expectations and rekindled a love for something I never thought I could do professionally. The list could go on…

That evening, we settled into leftovers, enjoyed different games scattered about, and fellowshipped with family we get to see far too little of. It was another good Thanksgiving Day.

Keep It Clean

The girls have always loved bath time. They would spend hours in the tub if we would let them. Recently, they’ve taken to enjoy an occasional soak in our Jacuzzi tub. They don’t go for the jets, but they love bubbles. I’m thankful every night when they squeal with delight at the question, “Are you ready for a bath?” Part of me winces, prepared for the time that “yes” is a “no”. So far so good, though. The girls are perfectly content spending the rest of the evening with “raisin toes”.

Grandma's Party

This past November, the girls’ Grandma (Jeff’s mom) celebrated a milestone birthday, number 65. We celebrated with a big birthday bash. Decked out in our finest, we gathered to eat some tasty appetizers, roast and all the fixin’s, and Grandma’s favorite (and my lame attempt at Jeff’s grandma’s recipe) German Chocolate cake. Nearly everyone Grandma loves dearly was there, so a good time was had by all!

Say Cheese!

The girls have pretty much always given me a hard time about pictures. It’s especially annoying to me, given my profession. Of course, they’re probably numb to the excitement of picture taking because they’ve had a camera in their faces practically since they were born. Sure, there were occasional glimmers of cooperation, but it wasn’t until recently that the girls began embracing the art of photography, their cute faces as the subject.

With this newfound enjoyment of all that is digital, Cadie has discovered a new smile. It’s hysterical, at least to me. She’s even taken to posing. I won’t even try to describe it. Just enjoy the selections below, first of Cadie’s new smile, then some proof that Cadence and Madeline truly do enjoy having their picture taken these days.

Eureka!

A lot braver in our traveling adventures these days, we said “Yes” when Grana and Poppy invited the four of us to accompany them to Eureka Springs at the beginning of November. The weather was beautiful, Jeff had a free weekday, and I was anxious to get out of the house, so it was a no brainer.

I very easily get car sick, so I staked my claim on the driver’s seat right away. Poppy sat up front with me, Daddy hung with the kiddos in the middle, and poor Grana (being the only one small enough) got stuck in the very back. The girls did well with the trip. They pretty much stayed entertained, but were ready for a break when we made a pit stop that morning at War Eagle. I used to go to War Eagle every year growing up because my mom was a vendor in the big craft show, but it’s been ages since I’ve been, so I was equally as excited as the girls. There is a huge wooden bridge and a real, working watermill, so the girls were in absolute awe. Of course, we had to walk across the bridge, and they were thrilled to stand and watch the rushing water. In the meantime, I had a death grip on each of, constant visions of one of them falling in and me having to dive into the icy water after them rushing through my head. We escaped unharmed. They also had several ducks and geese roaming around, so Cadie, our resident animal lover, chased them around. Maddie was a little scared of them, but she warmed up eventually. We ventured into the mill for some light shopping and breakfast. The girls helped themselves to some homemade cinnamon rolls and Grana doctored up some “coffee” for them. Yes, Grana has started a bad habit, but at least the concoction is more cream than coffee. Finally, it was time to move on, so we all piled back in and readied ourselves for them remainder of the trip.

Everything was going just fine until we started getting closer to town, weaving through the mountains and rolling over the hills. Maddie was getting a tad cranky, and I knew we were in trouble when she said her tummy hurt. Neither of the girls has ever said that their tummy hurts, so I knew it was the real thing. We were almost there, so I thought to myself, “Please, let us just get there!” A few minutes later, the panting began. Then, seconds later, she was sick all over herself. Bless her heart, it was terrible. Luckily, it was contained to her lap and her seat, but oh did it stink! She’d had chocolate milk all morning, so that should be descriptive enough. Of course, she was upset. She’d thrown up only once before, so she wasn’t totally sure what was going on. I remember, though, how pitiful she sounded when she said, “What happened? Did I spill?” It was a team effort getting her cleaned up. Poppy took Cadie to a nearby bridge to play, Grana got Maddie undressed, Daddy cleaned up the car seat, and I search for towels, paper towels, something to clean my poor child up with, and a trash can. Luckily, I always pack them spare clothes, so we didn’t have to worry about her having something to wear. What I hadn’t packed, though, was an extra Bebe. She doesn’t have one, and poor Bebe got the full brunt of the blow. So, Bebe spent the remainder of the trip in a Ziploc bag. Maddie didn’t care, though, she still held her and cuddled her. After everything was cleaned up as well as could be, we loaded back up and continued the short distance into town.

Our first stop was the train station, for the girls, the main point of our trip. Unfortunately, Grana and Poppy had mistaken November for the end of October, so we had arrived a few days late; the train was closed. Trying not to let on to the girls my disappointment, we cheerfully announced that they were going to get to explore the train station and see the outside of the trains. They’re smart enough they totally didn’t buy it, but young enough that they didn’t argue otherwise. It wasn’t the train trip they were looking forward to, but it sufficed. We spent at least an hour exploring the grounds, climbing on and around the various trains they had scattered about. It was fun enough. Then we headed to the shopping district.

None of us was excited about leaving the windows closed in the car, waiting to get toasty and stinky with the smell of Maddie’s sick, but thus is the nature of a trip to Eureka Springs. So, we cracked the windows and were on our shopping way. I knew the girls would enjoy the day and I wasn’t disappointed. We strolled in and out of stores, looking at all the wares, seeing things here and there that we couldn’t live without. We meandered through the streets, until we could meander no more, and finally succumbed to lunch time. The weather was beautiful, and ideally, we would have eaten outside, but all outdoor dining was strategically placed next to bridges and/or staircases, and I knew the girls wouldn’t be able to keep themselves from wanting to scale them, so we settled for a restaurant that was actually underground. It turned out to be a good choice, too, because they sat us at a large table, right next to a children’s play area, full of toys and games. It was perfect. The girls played while we waited for the food, at their lunch, then resumed their play while the rest of us finished our meals in peace.

After lunch, we returned to shopping until we could shop no more. Our last stop was an historic hotel. The grounds were beautiful and the hotel was fascinating. We explored the grounds and came across an area flooded with leaves. Unable to resist, I built up a huge mountain and showed the girls how to throw them in the air. We played in the leaves awhile, then decided it was time to head home. Of course, Maddie had to have one last incident before we hit the road. It wasn’t nearly as bad this time around, thank goodness.

The trip home, on the other hand, was another story. Although they slept for the entire middle of the trip, the final leg was miserable. They were tired, tired of being in the car, and hungry. We made it home, though, and the girls slowly crashed, exhausted from their day of fun. I imagine we’ll go back in the spring when the train starts again. Something tells me we will check ahead this time, though.

Soap, Suds, and Nostalgia

I’ve been especially nostalgic lately. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s the beginning of a new year or the girls’ impending third birthday. This morning, as I sat and folded socks, I remembered how much I loved washing and folding the girls’ laundry when they were in the hospital, especially right after they were born. Due to their fragile nature, we weren’t allowed to participate in their care, even tasks as simple as changing diapers or bedding. Although I wasn’t worried about our bond as mother and child, that inability to participate did make me feel a little detached from the situation. In the absence of being able to hold them – or really even to touch them – doing their laundry was my way of connecting with my daughters. Although laundry is often thrown into the category of mundane and tedious tasks that parents often take for granted, it was a lifeline for me.

It’s funny the things you remember.

Hallowzooeen

One of the events I was most excited about taking the girls to this past fall was Hallowzooeen at the Tulsa Zoo. I had never been, but had heard that it was a really fun event. So, thanks to the generosity of one of my clients, we were able to attend for free on October 29th.

It was pretty chilly, at least for October, but the girls’ costumes were pretty thick, so the coldness only showed on their noses. We’ve taken them to the zoo a couple of times, so it wasn’t an entirely new adventure, but we’d certainly never been there in the evening. The zoo is a much different place at night!

The first thing they were drawn to was the large globe that rotates and cascades with water. Something about that thing gets them every time. I was more interested in them visiting with the people dressed in animal costumes. There was a giraffe, panda bear, lion and others. They weren’t quite sure what to think about them, but we did manage to get them close enough to at least give a couple of them high five’s. Once Nana arrived, we were on our way.

Different companies had booths set up along the way. There was plenty of candy to be had, so we didn’t worry too much about getting to every booth. Of course, the inflatables that were scattered about were a big hit with the girls. That’s one thing they never shy away from.

One of the last booths we walked past had music playing. When Cadie hears music, she dances; it’s automatic. I don’t think she even thinks about it. So, Cadie started dancing, but very quickly spotted a “mummy” dancing in her direction. She was pretty wary at first, but eventually gave in to the music and danced along with him. Of course, I didn’t get the camera out in time, I was too busy enjoying the moment. It was just about the cutest thing I had ever seen. The long line of trick-or-treaters “ooh-ed” and “ahh-ed” in unison. Cadie was a big hit.

We had hopes to take the girls on a train ride around the park, but it was just too cold. So, we settled for the Carousel instead, and certainly didn’t get any complaints. We ended up having to ride it twice. Cadie rode the giraffe, then the zebra, and Maddie rode the penguin, then the tiger. Cadie had a death grip on me the first go around, but soon enjoyed herself. By the end of her second ride, she was shouting “Up! Down” every time the animals rose and fell.

Finally, it was time to call it an evening. With their candy in tow, we trekked back to the car and headed home, visions of our children falling asleep on the way home in Mommy and Daddy’s heads.

Pumpkin Monsters

One of the girls’ friends, Ethan, celebrated his 3rd birthday in October. As a party favor, all of the kids got a pumpkin and a goodie bag full of pumpkin decorations. So, one evening, we sat down and decorated their pumpkins. They were immediately -- and surprisingly -- very attached to their creations. I knew they would become pumpkin pie if we left them inside at the mercy of the girls, so we declared the front porch as their new home. With great reluctance and some tears, we placed their monster pumpkins on the porch. As the days passed, they visited them every time we stepped out onto the porch. It was a short-lived love affair, though; not long before Halloween, I noticed one of them was getting pretty rotten, so November 1st, they both made a quiet trip to the trash can. They enjoyed it so much, though, you can bet we’ll do it again next year!

For the Love of Ranch

The girls have developed a newfound love for Ranch. The dip kind, not the dressing. You know, the kind made with sour cream. Cadie loves broccoli, so for her, the two go hand in hand. Maddie, however, is more smitten than Cadie. At least enough that she’s taken to simply eating it right off the spoon. She’s not interested in distractions like broccoli or carrots. She’s a straight dip girl. I can’t really complain, though. I put some on Maddie’s sandwich today, and she easily scarfed down twice as much as she usually does. Oh, for the love of Ranch!